caribeaux:

caribeaux:

drdavidbrinner:

how do you know youre asexual if you havent had sex???

how do you know you arent sexually attracted to toothpaste if youve never slathered your genitalia with it and shoved the tube up your anus????

how do you know?????

You have some shockingly good points. Just a second

Update: I am not sexually attracted to toothpaste

(Source: megachikorita)

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intensional:

blanketkisser:

intensional:

whydospn-merlindothiswhy:

intensional:

p0intless—blogger:

intensional:

imactinginsane:

intensional:

le-madcap:

intensional:

xomtrencherxo:

intensional:

Look at all those ducks

Those are chickens

Look at all those ducks

Those are chickens

Look at all those ducks

THOSE ARE CHICKENS

Look at all those ducks

T H O S E. A R E. C H I C K E N S.

Look at all those ducks

I fricken owned chickens a long time ago. THOSE ARE CHICKENS. I also own four ducks. I would know the difference. Those are not ducks nor will the ever be ducks.

Look at all those ducks

I swear to god do you know what a duck is? those are chickens 

Look at all those ducks

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rockmusicfeedsmysoul:

evincibly:

am I the only one who looks at every grape before I eat it 

am i the only one who looks at ANY FOOD before I eat it?

(Source: evincibly)

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society: oh you have your period? well you have two options.
person: okay.
society: you can use sanitary pads, which make you feel like you are wearing a diaper, and have the added fun benefit of being extremely uncomfortable and give you the extreme paranoia that they will not be enough coverage and at any moment with any movement or sudden sneeze you'll bleed over onto your clothes and walk around all day with blood stained trousers while everyone points and laughs at you.
person: sounds awful. what's my second option.
society: a penis shaped wad of cotton that you shove uncomfortably inside yourself and it catches the blood before it leaves your body.
person: still seems pretty awful.
society: wait! it gets better! there's the outside chance that using those will kill you!
person: well, are they at least free? like how people can have access to free condoms? i mean, it's not like i'm choosing for this to happen.
society: HAHAHA! that's funny. no, you have to pay for them. and they're really fucking expensive.
person:
society: oh, and if you tell anyone that you ARE on your period, your judgement, opinions, and reactions are going to be dismissed as the crazy ramblings of a lunatic.
person:
society:
person: i think i'll go with my third option.
society:
person:
society: what third option?
person: i think i'll bleed on everything you love.
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(Source: yodiscrepo)

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assholedisney:

today I saw a preteen girl pick up Mean Girls at Target and ask her friend what it was. She didn’t even know. She said it sounded dumb. The people are forgetting. The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it.

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(Source: rock-lee)

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fuckyeahsexanddrugs:

this is literally what happens when a young adult starts working full time

(Source: himynameistade)

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grimelords:

I had a dream about a cowboy movie last night and I woke up to write it down so I would remember

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dearborns:

foxnewsofficial:

they should replace hospital gowns with colourful mexican ponchos because they’re kinda similar and no one could be sad 

if we’re gonna die let’s die looking like a peruvian folk band

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saberspinner:

feminismisahatemovement:

HIS FACE

OH MY GOSH

(Source: tastefullyoffensive)

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(Source: qq45xx)

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broodleboodlescoodles:

helloloveducks:

babygirlimablur:

This is it. This is how it started.

It baffles me when no one I work with knows why I’m so cool.

THATS WHAT ITS FROM HOLY SHIT

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charlubby:

i know shipping can be a bit expensive sometimes but uh

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crrabs:

STEAL HER LOOK: Judge Judy

Fendi judge gown: $399

Versace diamond band wring: $2999

Channel diamond ear wrings: $4999

MAC deep plum lipstick: $17.50

Lase detailing: $1.50 per foot

Smile: pricless

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